This was a question on the radio a couple of weeks ago. Who’s is your 2am friend?
The other day I was discussing this with some guys in the Pub. And as I went up to the bar, I received a call from a friend whose life was just falling apart, and he needed someone to talk too. I went outside, and we spent about half an hour chatting. By the end of the conversation, he was feeling much better and able to cope with the situation. We met for lunch the next day, and things were still bad, but he was dealing with it. But just imagine if he had no one to call and the very moment when everything seemed to be crashing to the ground. We know from the statistics I’ve already mentioned in my blogs, that the consequence of situations like this for Men is tragic.
Let’s start with what is a 2am friend. A 2am friend is that friend you are able to call at any time, 2am, 2pm, 12 noon, 8pm…. Anytime. And that friend will come to your aid.
These days, we seem to be too busy to be that 2am friend. We can all say, ‘just call if you need me’ and ‘let me know if I can be of help’.
But do we really mean that, when we are called at 2 in the morning to get out of bed and go to a friend in need? Even though we have to get up for work at 6am the next day, and have had a hard few weeks ourselves?
How far will we go for someone else? Even if they call us their 2am friend, but they may not be ours?
Literally today as I was writing this, I received a message from a friend in need. Was I going to be phoney in my response or be true to my word. “I am there for you my friend”. I really hope I can be, but only time will tell.
Do you have a 2am friend or friends?
As I said before, blokes are rubbish at talking We will avoid emotional situations at all costs. We won’t phone someone up, because we don’t know what to say. Well say that “I don’t know what to say, but I’m here for you if you need a friend”, offer practical things like a lift somewhere, a beer, a coffee, or just someone for them to shout at and get whatever pain they are going through right then, out!
And if you really are someone’s 2am friend, be prepared to get up at 2am and go fix a flat tyre, pick them up off the pavement when they’ve had mental breakdown, pick them up from the police station, or just need a friend.
The Science bit……
Did you know?
It is a known fact Helping Others Will Actually Make You Feel better. Giving back has a physical and mental effect on your body.
• Helping others will actually make You feel great.
• People volunteered and donated to charity, the mesolimbic system is triggered. Which is the ‘reward’ pathway in your brain.
• which also releases feel-good chemicals and spurs you to perform more kindly acts.
• Charitable activities lowered their stress.
• Helping others can teach you to help yourself.
• People who volunteer have been found to have higher self-esteem and overall well-being.
• People who participate in volunteer work feel more empowered than those who do not.
• People who volunteered over the last 12 months said volunteering enriches their sense of purpose.
• More calm and peaceful than people who didn’t participate in volunteer work.
• Volunteering as a way to “promote a deeper sense of gratitude as we recognize more of what is already a blessing/gift/positive in our life.”
• Helping Others Will Spur Others To Pay It Forward And Keep The Cycle Of Happiness Going
I’m not keen on the challenge “Be a man” or “Grow some” when a guy is going through some tough times. But I would say to you, if you really want to “Be a Man” and “Grow Some”, be that 2am friend….. for real!
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